UPDATE 2-10-18. IT HAS NOW BEEN RELEASED THAT FEDERAL TAX ID#S WERE COMPROMISED IN THE EQUIFAX DATA BREACH LAST YEAR. THUS THE BREACH OF 143 MILLION ACCOUNTS INCLUDED BUT IS NOT LIMITED TO; NAME, ADDRESS, TEL#, DOB, DRIVER’S LICENSE #, SS#, CREDIT CARD #S, AND FEDERAL TAX ID#.
February 7, 2018
It’s time. Stockjaw bends to tax reality, and the Equifax aftermath. Were you also notified by EquiIdiot that “Your personal data may have been compromised?” Two of our crew were. Our data’s out. That never comes back, except zombie-style, when it’s leveraged by the shambling criminal horde. They’ll get around to it, eventually. Criminals have busy schedules. You simply can’t ripoff everybody in one day. We’re Equifucked, along with at least 143 million other Americans. What’s that mean?
The new EquiClean Data Retrieval Tool. “We got this.” Experience more; the new EquiAss–workin’ on your behalf.”
I f you received such a notification, your play is to file your tax return as soon as possible–or someone you don’t kmow will. Unfortunately, that means filing your taxes as fast as you possibly can, for the rest of your life. Think we’re kidding?
B y the way. Isn’t it nice to now know that what we all just went through was engineered? That’s right, with mitigating factors, say 450 days rolling, rising rates, questionable valuations, and then the engineering. Very nice. “Please speak into the clown’s nose…please drive thru.”
The savage beating dished out on Friday, Monday, and yesterday, was all created, fabricated. We did not dive and then flash-crash, due to dynamics intrinsic to the market. We were bulldozed by dumbasses who bet against volatility. Who bets the wind’s not going to blow? Even more puzzling, who piled into this turd-bag note? Once again, responsible investors lost thousands each due to the irresponsible and greedy innovators of financial products. They call these ETPs–Exchange Traded Products.
Stockjaw’s response is best illustrated as a single steel-toed boot.
The bootiest we get.
T h e XIV was, right was, a double leveraged inverse volatility ETN. It bet against a common, unavoidable, element of the market–volatility. Wow. They should be eschorted of any property in the money business. Dreamin’s good. The XIV exploded like a golf ball off a concrete retaining wall. Some spike of what? Right–volatility. What the hell–and along comes some creepy rigged-to-blow ETN(exchange traded note.) Wow. Then somebody approves it for the market. Huh?
Security? Underlying asset? “Just trust us” is exactly what this note says. That’s known as a ringer. There indeed is no underlying asset here. Just another BlackRock pickin’ up roadkill product? The XIV may have been on the worse end of such products, it is by far not the only hyper-flawed product. Ever seen a triangular prism?
W h a t did they do? Hedged against S&P 500 Index futures options. Get it? We don’t. That’s three things. Hedging. Index futures. Options. Who cooks this shit up? And what’d we get? A “technical glitch.” You kidding? We lost in-line with the NASDAQ., because of a mechanical glitch? Wall Street cooked more “innovation.” Need we say it–CDOs. This wonderful investment they called the XIV journeyed from $91 to $7 in a single session. That’s real staying power. And guess what? No one will ever be heard responsible. How’s that for a “controlled system?” With innovation like this who needs Rocket Man?
S o it’s tax day at Stockjaw. Tax day?–we’re geeked. Heads down we push #s into shape, so we can get back to what we do. File today. Hold please…
Thanks for reading. Keep looking.